Tuesday 12 October 2010

A meeting in the woods by firelight

Thanks to all who attended the Welsh Society dinner in Massachusetts last Saturday, 9th December and to Bob and Nancy who collected me up from my hotel and drove me there through the beautiful rolling vistas while informing me of further treats to come when I get to Boston in two weeks time. Thanks also to Susan Davies Sit for her inspired presentation on the subject of copper mining in North Wales. It was both thought-provoking and informative. Llongyfarchiadau Sue!

Good news! I got to sell 20 copies of my book, No Room to Live, at the dinner - which was a godsend. I didn’t fancy carting them all the way to Brattleboro, Vermont, today (Sunday 10th) by Amtrak. I’m heavy-laden as it is and can hardly lift my suitcase!

When things get rough at sea the captain and crew sometimes have to jettison the cargo. Well, I’m beginning to think that I’ll have to do something similar with the contents of my case!

Last night was spent packing that case – after a last supper at the Chowder Pot, nearby. I don’t ordinarily eat this late (9pm), but it was well worth it this time, the Reef & Beef, an 8oz choice top sirloin, accompanied with stuffed Maine lobster tail was superb.

A joke for you that was told to me by a new-found friend at a meeting: This guy was stumbling drunkenly on the seashore when he tripped over an old bottle that was partially buried in the sand. Suddenly a genie appeared and told him, “You have two wishes, master. What is your first wish?”

The drunk didn’t hesitate. “I’d like to have a perpetual pint of Guinness, please?”

“Your wish is my command”, said the genie. And with that, a frothy-topped, pitch-black pint of Guinness appeared from nowhere. The drunk couldn’t believe his luck and started drinking it with a passion. And the more he drank the more the pint glass filled up with the black nectar.

The genie then addressed him a second time. “O master, what is your second wish?”

Without a second thought the drunk replied, “I’ll have another one of these, please!”

I just about managed to pack my case in time to be collected from my hotel at 9am the following day (Sunday) by Phil Valentine, CCAR (Connecticut Community for Addiction Recovery) Executive Director. I was to accompany Phil and his family to a service at their local church, Trinity Covenant Church in Manchester, CT, where little Mary, Phil and Sandy’s youngest, was being christened.

Prior to the service proper, however, I was privileged to attend a men-only Sunday school class. The topic under discussion was the 6th Commandment: Thou shall not kill. Interesting for me was the fact that several men shared at depth about difficulties they were encountering in their lives. I’ve only ever seen this happen in Fellowship meetings. I was taken aback by this level of self-disclosure. Members of this class obviously had complete trust in their fellow members and felt that it was a safe environment for them to be vulnerable. I was later told that this level of self-disclosure and vulnerability was first modelled to them by AA members who attend the same church. An example of AA having a positive effect on religion!

The highlight of the morning undoubtedly was little Mary’s christening. When asked by the pastor why she had decided she wanted to be christened, Mary replied, “To have all my sins removed.”

Phil and I reflected on this as we travelled towards a restaurant for a pre-travel meal and wondered what the heck she’s been up to in her 6 short years!

Incidentally, Mary looked beautiful. She made us all cry and I felt privileged to have witnessed her strong (and unprompted) testament of faith.

“So, what have you learnt from your visit to CCAR?” That was Phil Valentine’s question to me over lunch. This was my reply:

“That the secret of CCAR’s success, I believe, is good management - especially in organizing the recovery community’s ability to care and bridge the gap between treatment and build productive lives. Good training is also a hallmark – especially your highly acclaimed Recovery Training Series. Add to this your innovative Telephone Recovery Support service and your Recovery Housing Database and the simplicity of your philosophy: ‘you’re in recovery if you say you are’ and you have a formidable and highly efficient and effective organization. However, underpinning everything is your success in putting a Face on Recovery. By speaking publicly about the reality of recovery, CCAR members put a face on recovery. CCAR members put a public face on recovery by testifying before the legislature and state commissions, as well as through well-attended public events like Recovery Walks. Employing Alpha Female staff members also helps!”

And shortly after that I was on the Amtrak train heading towards Brattleboro, Vermont. I felt sad saying goodbye to Phil. Phil and I clicked from the outset. I hope it won’t be long before we meet again. I get a strong sense that we are somehow destined to meet again soon. Indeed, I think we’ll even get to work together.

The views en route to Vermont, which I filmed, were impressive and all they had been built up to be. The autumn colours were nothing short of spectacular.

Mark Ames, Vermont Recovery Network Coordinator, was at the station to greet me. And, after a Fellowship meeting and a Chinese meal, we drove towards Camp Spofford and the Vermont Recovery Coach Academy.

This week I’m going to be trained to be a Recovery Coach. But more on this and how I get on during the coming week.

In the meantime, I have a quote for you from Jo Romano, one of the facilitators: “There really needs to be a vision in Recovery Coaching. Without helping people see what their vision is - which includes what they’re really interested in, what their values are, what their passion is – they’ll never get to achieve it. When you become mindful and focused – you manifest it, whether it’s good or bad.”

And what of the meeting in the woods by firelight? That happened this evening (11th) at the end of a perfect day. Several of my new friends from the state of Vermont (well. It was Ken actually) decided to build a fire in the forest and hold an “all-recovery group” meeting out in the open air. Only alcoholics could arrange such a thing at such short notice! But it was fun; it was sincere and it was emotional. And the theme of the meeting? Well, it couldn’t be anything other than ‘gratitude’ could it?

And your music I’m listening to at this moment: Alive and Kicking by Simple Minds: Once Upon a Time.

Nos dawch pawb. Cysgwch yn dawel. Goodnight everyone.

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